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Spent most of the day at HUH again. After the see-tee scan Celeste got moved to a new room on the third floor. Helen was there when we arrived so I excused myself for some lunch. I ended up buying the worst chinese food in the world. It was "beef" and brocoli. While the brocoli definitely was the described vegetable, even if pathetically limp, the "beef" could only be mistaken for cow meat were it to be depicted in a black-and-white film. The color, texture, and taste were all wrong, all leaning towards a diabolical combination of boneless chicken and silly-putty. I am never going to that place again. You know, what with all the time I spend on Georgia Ave.
The hardest parts of the day were the every-six-hours blood tests. The tourniquets would make the scrapes on her wrist and hand burn to the point where she would cry, and you know she doesn't cry easily. I could only hold her head and wait for it to be over. I couldn't look; I would have passed out.
I hated myself for not doing something. I imagined myself chasing off the phlebotomist, my hands flailing and my voice raised. Why can't I stop them from hurting her?
Eventually I came home. I rented Swimming Pool, which is very good but fails to win the coveted "As Good As 'Lost in Translation'" prize that I am waiting to assign someday to some movie sometime.
In about a half hour it will have been six hours since the last blood test. They'll wake her up and make her cry. I told the nurses to give her morphine right before so it wouldn't hurt so much. I hope to god that they remember.
posted by weiss @ 11:19 PM
