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Tuesday, January 11, 2005
thank you indiana!
i just want to announce that, today, for the first time in a very long time, i came to believe that ev'ry lil' thing gonna be alright. yes my friends, today I got my food stamp card activated. i went to kroger and the state of indiana paid the bill. and yes, the good ol' hoosier state paid for my 24 pack of decaf dt. coke too. it's nice to be able to say that the state is supporting my coke habit. i was worried, i mean, so maybe it's not nourishing, but people need it.

and i thought all of you tax paying peoples would like to know that sometimes, sometimes the money they take from your paychecks and like every freakin purchase you ever make goes to people like me who have $15,000 in medical bills, son of satan insurance and make $85 a week.

i'm actually pretty impressed with the food stamps program. "food stamps" are not like those fake stamps that we used to get in the mail from greenpeace only with pictures of broccoli and ham and peaches on them as i had previously assumed. you just get a card that looks and behaves like a check card. (unfortunatly the program requires you to watch a video that takes 30 minutes to explain that food stamp cards are just like check cards. minus 5 points for them) i got my food card benefits within a month of applying for them, pretty damn speedy for any government-run program. and they actually give me more than enough money to buy the food i need - i know this doesn't happen in any other gov program. so i give the "hoosier works" card-food-stamp program a 26.3 or something.

and i think everything's gonna be alright. it might be tight, and everyone in my fucking house might be graduating and getting married while i'm alone and crazy and not graduating, but it's gonna be ok. because indiana loves me. and jesus too.

p.s. teresa: i wanna be your lubber baby!! you could call me lubber girl and we could walk around like pigeons and you could tell me that joke that i made up about the pigeon in a marathon who sprains its neck.......
and, um, pirate viagra? i bet musscleman would know where to get some.

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